Jackie is a punk rocker

I was reading an article this morning about the author who was tasked by Jackie and Robert Kennedy to write about John Kennedy’s assassination in 1963. It’s an interesting article, but the thing that got me was something that was unrelated to the book.

Blow them the full watts tonight

It occurred to me this morning how to solve all the problems in the Middle East.

People are angry over there, as you know. They blow themselves up, hack body parts off each other, drive jet airliners into buildings and generally shuffle around in an angry, aimless cloud of perpetual dust and confusion. They are surly, mean and fearless, and you don’t want to cross them on a good day, let alone when they haven’t had whatever narcotic they favor in a few days.

Much to the relief of adolescent boys everywhere…

Michael Jackson has dropped dead. I did learn something from Jackson – no, not how to moonwalk – but rather this very important lesson: if you call yourself something, everyone will eventually quote it as fact. In Jackson’s case, it was the laughable and grandiose “King of Pop” title. One day his management started telling …

Complacency is not an option

“Yeah, I know we’re supposed to be…I know the human race is supposed to get down on its knees in front of all this new technology and kiss the microchip’s circuits. It don’t impress me all that much. When there ain’t nothing but “You make! You buy! You die!” That’s the motto of America! You …

Life is just a bowl of chickpeas

A new Fresh & Easy market recently opened a few blocks from the house. That is unexciting news unless you’re old and weird, as I appear to be. So it was great news to me, especially since the other nearby markets are in crowded areas at least a mile away, and feature everyday high (and …

Well, I’ll be damned

Did the fresh new President Obama just include “nonbelievers” in his list of religious beliefs that made up America? I was listening to his inaugural address in the car, and I’m not sure I heard that right. That has to be a first.

The brutal reality of a life spent doing your own thing

It is really becoming irritating to see so many people writing about how much they are suffering financially when they have chosen to live outside of society’s typical work/pay scenario. There are certain choices that you make, and you have to live with those choices. If you choose to be a street mime or operate a Michigan turtle rescue, you shouldn’t complain that you are broke or hungry, that your bank is screwing you with overdraft fees, or your electricity was shut off.

Move aside and let the man go through

These Obama photos are in Time magazine this week.

The Land of the Lost, without the Sleestaks

Well, this is pretty cool; youvebeenleftbehind.com. In a nutshell, this guy, Mark Heard, is running a service that will contact your loved ones for you, via email, after the “rapture.” The rapture, in case you didn’t know, is when JESUS comes and takes all the boys and girls who have behaved and eaten their vegetables up to heaven to prance around forever in white robes and watch the rest of us suffer an eternity under the thumb of the beast SATAN (don’t know what that means? Imagine you’re the guy in Apocalypto who’s being chased, only instead of running for a day or two, you have to run forever and the guys who are chasing you keep shooting you with arrows and spears and you’re bleeding and stumbling and you can’t breathe, and all the time this is happening your wife and kids are drowning in a pit full of wet howler monkeys she had to beat to death with a stick, and you can’t get to them to help – I think it’s kind of like that – forever).

Simple is as simple does

Have you ever heard of Dean Cameron? I know, neither had I. Then someone pointed me to a site he runs; spamscamscam.com. When I hit the site I was kind of shocked, since the design and layout is lifted – exactly – from a version of datapimp site that was up for about five years.

I haven’t given up, I’ve just stopped trying

I stuck the knife deep into the heart of datapimp.com on Sunday, and killed off my little 8 year old project. 8 years and three months to be exact, but who’s counting. That’s a long time to run an unsuccessful web business. I think we may have set some kind of record. By unsuccessful I …

Grab the closet case by the horns

Hey, where you been? Me, I’ve been working on an office move for the company I work for. It’s been kind of a massive project and it’s not finished yet, even though we actually moved all our shit over almost two weeks ago. Still a lot of loose ends to tie up, and it’s been …

A rose by any other name, still doesn’t smell so good

Every day I am charmed and enchanted by the thousands of names I see spray painted on every blank space along the Los Angeles freeways, but recently one in particular has caught my eye. Heading north on the 110 freeway you can see it on the 405 overpass: KUNTNESTFLAKE. I’m not sure what a Kuntnestflake is – I assume it’s three names written as one.

Brother, can you spare a town?

There is a flurry of condo building in downtown San Pedro, and the locals are divided about it. The business and land owners are all for anything new, no matter how wrongheaded, vile or destructive it is, and then there are the non-land and business owners (myself among them) who grimly count down the days until we are nudged out of this beautiful joint by millionaire carpetbaggers and idiots.

Another cantankerous rant, surprise!

Have you seen The Corporation? Well, you should. Go put it in your Netflix queue right now. I’ll wait.

While you’re watching it, remember how much like a corporation the current administration behaves. They are all about the bottom line, as long as their asses aren’t on the line. As the kids say.

Brush fires burn Los Angeles county these days, as they usually do this time of year, and a brown layer of doom hovers over much of the basin we live in, waiting patiently. For what, I don’t know. What does doom wait for? More doom? We are balanced on the edge everywhere you go, you probably see it in your own city.